Personal Development Blog

What I Wish I Knew When I Was 20

Major life transitions such as leaving the protected environment of school or starting a new career can be daunting. It is scary to face a wall of choices, knowing that no one is going to tell us whether or not we are making the right decision. There is no clearly delineated path or recipe for success. Even figuring out how and where to start can be a challenge. That is, until now.

As executive director of the Stanford Technology Ventures Program, Tina Seelig guides her students as they make the difficult transition from the academic environment to the professional world, providing tangible skills and insights that will last a lifetime. Seelig is an entrepreneur, neuroscientist, and popular teacher, and in What I Wish I Knew When I Was 20 she shares with us what she offers her students—provocative stories, inspiring advice, and a big dose of humility and humor.

These pages are filled with fascinating examples, from the classroom to the boardroom, of individuals defying expectations, challenging assumptions, and achieving amazing success. Seelig throws out the old rules and provides a new model for reaching our highest potential. We discover how to have a healthy disregard for the impossible, how to recover from failure, and how most problems are remarkable opportunities in disguise.

What I Wish I Knew When I Was 20 is a much-needed book for everyone looking to make their mark on the world.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars It’s never too late!
It’s never too late to learn and make your place in the world. I loved this book - thought provoking and inspiring!

4 Stars Useful right now
Fantastic. This book gets right to the point, presenting not only great ideas, but ways of thinking - daring, positive thinking - commonly practiced by very successful people and great leaders. It’s not too analytical, and it does not need to be to help open up minds that are ready and willing to open to ways to make great things happen. The many anecdotes the book includes about people making great things happen (sometimes with almost no resources but their own creativity and confidence!) can be translated into all kinds of scenarios. I REALLY wish I had read this when I was 20, or 30!

5 Stars What I wish I knew when I was 20
What a creative summary of how to “think outside the box”- so entertaining and insightful I read half of it out loud to my spouse! A different way of viewing the world and the whole concept of “opportunity”. The author is soooooo imaginative! Wish we lived close enough to take a class from her!

5 Stars Great for any aage
Love the creativity of this book. It gives interesting examples of how to look at situations and problems differently. After a few chapters I got a pad and pencil to start taking notes. Good lessons to try to build into all parts of your life.

5 Stars Took Notes!
Although interested enough to read, I wasn’t sure it would actually apply to me and my life. I’m a stay a home Mom (with young kids [4 & 6] with a traveling husband and an ageing Grandma with dementia…like I said, wasn’t sure this would apply to my life.

I made it to chapter three or four before I realized, goodness, I should be taking notes. This is a great book for those at any age, who want or are starting to look at the world with different set of eyes. I felt like I missed something early in life…held back if you will by some choices & advise. This book really helps to open up your mind and mental power to the possiblity of ideas. It’s one I won’t mind re-reading to refeash myself and one that I would recommend.

Tina does a great job of teaching with stories and examples.

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The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire: Harnessing the Infinite Power of Coincidence to Create Miracles

As elegant as his bestselling How to Know God and as practical as his phenomenal The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, this groundbreaking new book from Deepak Chopra contains a dramatic premise: Not only are everyday coincidences meaningful, they actually provide us with glimpses of the field of infinite possibilities that lies at the heart of all things. By gaining access to this wellspring of creation, we can literally rewrite our destinies in any way we wish.

From this realm of pure potential we are connected to everything that exists and everything that is yet to come. “Coincidences” can then be recognized as containing precious clues about particular facets of our lives that require our attention. As you become more aware of coincidences and their meanings, you begin to connect more and more with the underlying field of infinite possibilities. This is when the magic begins. This is when you achieve the spontaneous fulfillment of desire.

At a time when world events may leave us feeling especially insignificant and vulnerable, Deepak Chopra restores our awareness of the awesome powers within us. And through specific principles and exercises he provides the tools with which to create the magnificent, miraculous life that is our birthright.

From the Hardcover edition.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars very happy buyer
very efficient seller- very happy with the condition- was just like it was posted- and very happy with the book! will purchase from seller again! Thanks!

3 Stars Wow! What a revelation!
I’ve read many of Deepak’s books,some’re quite dry, this could be due to the fact that he’s a man of science.But this book amazes me, Deepak’s successfully used his spiritual insight as well as his knowledge of science to create a masterpiece.

Although you’ll come across terms like ‘Heisenberg Uncertainity Principle”,”Minkowski’s eight dimensional hyperspace” this book’s not that dry. (I happen to read the large print edition).

What Deepak’s trying to tell us is that we’re not alone in this universe,we’re all inter-related.

Deepak’s devised a program for the reader to follow so that he or she’ll be able to tune in with the desire of our Creator or Universe.

According to Deepak there’s no coincidences,it’s only our failure to discern the plan that our Creator’s put in place for us. If we can empty our mind, be still, listen to the voice within we’ll be able to navigate life together with our creator and fulfill all our wishes and lead a life of fulfilment.

5 Stars Love this book
Leave it to the venerable Deepak Chopra to subtly explain Quantum Physics in words that make ME understand the whole concept for the first time. The understanding of Quantum Physics lays the foundation for the rest of his principles and beliefs which can only be described as soul-awakening.

5 Stars The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire: Harnessing the Infinite Power of Coincidence
I love the book. It is one of those books that teaches you lessons that will stay with you the rest of your life.

2 Stars The Spontantous Fulfillment of Desire
I didn’t care for the method of presentation. Monotone!! I felt like I had to Work to hard to get what could have been verbalized with a easier approach. Deepak moves through “Some” material way to fast and seemed to come to a almost deadening halt going through Why the hand bones connected to the wrist bone, which is connected to the arm bone, etc….

To each his own, but I found This one to have Way to much info that I still am wondering why it was in there?? I Gave my Cd’s away. I recommend “Ask and It Is Given-Part 1 (at least) by Esther & Jerry Hicks for The Law of Attraction.

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Shibari You Can Use: Japanese Rope Bondage and Erotic Macramé

Japanese rope bondage and erotic macrame look complicated and intimidating, but you can learn the basics of this beautiful and sexy art form today. Bondage artist and educator Lee “Bridgett” Harrington takes you step-by-step through a variety of concepts and ties, giving you the tools to make aesthetically rewarding rope work. Each tutorial is broken down into easy to follow photographs by Circle23 with detailed descriptions, including how to tie all those knots (first secret of Japanese bondage revealed- there are only a few simple knots). From restrictive poses that limit movement to decorative rope work that accentuates the human form, Shibari You Can Use includes instruction on creating: - Shinju (Chest Harnesses) - Gyakuebi (Asian Style Hogtie) - Ebi or Kuri (Shrimp or Ball ties) - Rope Corsets - Strap-on Harnesses and Crotch Ropes - !and much more! Shake off your fears of looking silly the first time you tie someone up, get some rope, and you too can learn Japanese rope bondage.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Shibari You can use
The art of erotic bonding is fully illustrated in this very nice book. The wording makes it easy to understand the purpose of and history for Shibari. Also, the instruction part of the book gives practical application for one to explore this fascinating area of sensation.

5 Stars Shibari I use
As a bondage enthusiast and instructor, I have a significant selections of books in my library. This one however was a recent addition when I happened to meet Lee at a workshop. At the time I purchased the book to help support a starving artist/author passing through town, and it went strait to the bookshelf when I got home.

I was having a rope enthusiast meeting at my place and honestly had no idea what I wanted to select as a theme. Lee’s book provided the inspiration, the bondage in that book was simple but clever, and allowed me to settle on Corsetry as my theme.

I’ve since run through the book more thuroughly and have really enjoyed the idea’s it’s given me for variations on the bondage I’ve been practicing for 10 years.

The book may have it’s editing errors here and there, but for practical and useful bondage it’s a lovely book and I’m glad I own it.

5 Stars Execellent to read and use
Such a well written book, with plenty of easy to read, yet detailed instruction, and great attached photographs of each piece of work.

Highly recommended for novices and knowledgeable users alike.

4 Stars For the love of rope
This is a great instructional book for anyone with an interst in rope bondage as a form of body art. The instructions are clear and the ties transferable making it easy to start creating your own style of rope bondage. as a not quite beginner I found this book gave me a lot of new stuff to work with. Love the rope corsets. When is the next book coming out?

2 Stars More of the same thing
A big book with small explanations and it has a very high cost with a very low content.

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The Pursuit of Perfect

DO YOU WANT YOUR LIFE TO BE PERFECT? We’re all laboring under our own and society’s expectations to be perfect in every way-to look younger, to make more money, to be happy all the time. But according to Tal Ben-Shahar, the New York Times bestselling author of Happier, the pursuit of perfect may actually be the number-one internal obstacle to finding happiness. OR DO YOU WANT TO BE HAPPY? Applying cutting-edge research in the field of positive psychology-the scientific principles taught in his wildly popular course at Harvard University-Ben-Shahar takes us off the impossible pursuit of perfection and directs us to the way to happiness, richness, and true fulfillment. He shows us the freedom derived from not trying to do it all right all the time and the real lessons that failure and painful emotions can teach us. YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE PERFECT TO BE PERFECTLY HAPPY! In The Pursuit of Perfect, Tal Ben-Shahar offers an optimal way of thinking about failure and success–and the very way we live. He provides exercises for self reflection, meditations, and Time-Ins to help you rediscover what you really want out of life. Praise for Tal Ben-Shahar’s Happier: This fine book shimmers with a rare brand of good sense that is embedded in scientific knowledge about how to increase happiness. It is easy to see how this is the backbone of the most popular course at Harvard today. Martin E. P. Seligman, author of Authentic Happiness.

User Ratings and Reviews

4 Stars Don’t Be Fooled By The Title
It’s easy to look at the title and think this is one of those “I’m okay, you’re okay” sort of books. NOT the case!

Shahhar makes a compelling case that the enemy is not “perfection”, but the attitude of “perfectionism,” which robs accomplishment of its joy and always leads to dissatisfaction. The “perfect life” is attainable if you hang on to your Visions and keep a sense of balance and perspective in life.

Stylistically, this gets redundant at points. But the argument is compelling enough to be worth reiterating, even if the prose is repetitive.

5 Stars The best book ever!
I have been amazed with this book! Finally I find a book, that tells about me! My problems, that I have not been able to identify before this good. This is an excellent book, and it is very useful also to those, who don’t consider themselves to be perfectionists. We all are, in some ways, I think. It is also a very important book to all parents - do not make your kids unhappy perfectionists - even when you only mean good! This book is starting to change my life in profound way. Read it!

2 Stars Review of Audiobook
I think that the author’s advice to try to be an ‘optimalist’ rather than a ‘perfectionist’ is wise and helpful. Perfectionism can indeed make you miserable. If I had read the book instead of listened to it, I probably would have rated it with 3 or 4 stars.

I can’t give this CD set a good review, however. In general, I have trouble appreciating audio books, and this one is no exception. The author’s ideas merit pondering, and it’s difficult to ponder while listening to a book being read. You could pause the CD and ‘ponder’ but that doesn’t come naturally to me, And of course the index, notes, and excellent bibliography are missing.

The main problem with the CD version is, however, the reader. His voice is didactic, and he takes the opportunity to sound snide and sarcastic whenever he can fit it in. I’ve looked at the book itself, and find the author’s writing ‘personality’ to be gentle and humorous, but this didn’t come across at all. I can’t help but wish that Mr. Ben-Shahar had read the book himself. As a Harvard professor, he’s probably an accomplished lecturer.

3 Stars Good message ~ but all that repetition?
While the advice contained in this book is helpful, I have to ask myself did I need to read so much of this to get the message? The answer quite simply is “no”. Having make the point that striving for perfection essentially leads only to low self esteem when we inevitably fail, there is not really a lot more that can be said, yet Ben-Sharah manages to take over 250 pages proving it.

Yes, it contains proof, and exercises to help the afflicted, but it all come down to that first simple statement. But I very soon became impatient with what I was reading, not to mention extremely irritated at the constant interchange between “he” and “she” in the examples; pointless political correctness that simple gets in the way.

I don’t think I really needed to plough through all that tautologous writing to get the point. I could go on, but then the same accusation could be levelled at me!

5 Stars Highly recommended
You don’t need to be a perfectionist to learn something valuable from this book.

I highly recommend Tal’s “The Pursuit of Perfect”, whether you’re a perfectionist or not. He interweaves his wealth of knowledge of well-researched concepts with compelling personal experiences. The result is a very readable analysis of the dangers of perfectionism and an outline of a healthier alternative that he calls “optimalism.”

The central idea is that being an optimalist is adaptive and healthy. Tal draws a link between healthy optimalism and the goal of Positive Psychology, the scientific study of optimal human functioning.

In his book, he refers to a continuum. At one end we have the extreme perfectionists who reject reality, failure (and success) and painful emotions, and are rarely satisfied. At the other end of the continuum are the optimalists who accept the realities of being human and the inevitable, mixed results that come with purposeful action. They’ve learned to appreciate “good enough.”. There are shades of grey between these extremes on the continuum.

Throughout the book, in addition to research and information, Tal’s practical “Time In” exercises, reflections, and meditations help the reader lessen the grip of perfectionism. Tal does not set up unrealistic expectations. No quick fix, no silver bullets. It takes time, hard work and regular practice. This book reminds us to allow ourselves to have a good enough life and to give ourselves permission to be human. So begins the journey of moving towards optimalism, and to a place of peace, satisfaction, and happiness.

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Unleash the Warrior Within

A ten-year navy seal veteran, Richard “Mack” Machowicz was trained to complete every mission assigned to him, under any condition, because failure was not an option. Drawing from this experience, Unleash the Warrior Within (more than 25,000 copies since 2002, largely through word-of-mouth) offers Mack’s original program for mastering the arts of focus, discipline, and determination under any circumstances. In this newly revised edition, Mack shows readers how to use his seven principles of combat — such as Create an Action Mind-Set, The Critical Keys to Conquering Anything, and Guarantee the Win — in order to conquer fear and turn ambitions and dreams into reality.War is hell, but if you prepare properly for war, there’s not much about life that will take you by surprise. At least, that’s the premise of Unleashing the Warrior Within, in which author Richard Machowicz takes the lessons he learned as a Navy SEAL and applies them to real-life situations.

For example, in war you learn that there are three dynamic elements of combat: target, weapons, and movement. The target dictates the weapons, and the weapons dictate movement. In real life, your target is what you want; your weapons are your skills; and movement is whatever you need to get in position to use your skills.

But, since deciding upon a target is the step that’s most troubling to people, he adds another wartime analytical tool called the CARVER matrix. You lay out various targets you may have in life–a better job; getting in shape; buying a new house; and taking on a new business partner, say. Then you assess the criticality, accessibility, recognizability, and vulnerability of the target, plus its effect on your overall mission in life, and the potential return on your effort.

Machowicz calls his philosophy Bukido, and when you take his classes in Los Angeles, you learn self-defense along with these life-improvement skills. In this book, the object is to get you to choose a mission that is closest and most important to you, and then achieve your goals with military precision. By the time you’re through learning the seven principles of combat, what you’ve really learned is how to think critically and focus your efforts. Machowicz uses his students as examples of how the enemy in life is really a lack of action, allowing life to take you along for a ride. So if your current target is a solid self-improvement course, Unleashing the Warrior Within could be your most effective weapon. –Lou Schuler

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Add to your arsenal
Anyone who is on the self improvement path should read this book and place it in your library for future reference.

5 Stars Not Dead; Can’t Quit (NDCQ)
Unleash the Warrior Within by Richard “Mack” Machowicz is an excellent resource to help you achieve your goals by utilizing his simple yet effective strategies. The beauty of this book is in its simplicity. Mack has a way of taking complex ideas and breaking them down into basic usable elements that can then be applied to accomplishing your stated goal. He uses stories of his time as a Navy SEAL to get these ideas across. While your goals may not be as difficult as becoming a Navy SEAL the idea is to see how he applied his concepts to accomplish his goal. You can take the same concepts to reach your potential as well.

Some of the concepts discussed in the book are:

1. Three Dynamic Elements of Combat:

Targets dictate weapons. Weapons dictate movement.

2. Target Analysis Studies: CARVER -

-Criticality

-Accessibility

-Recognizability

-Vulnerability

-Effect on the overall mission

-Return on effort

3. Seven Keys to Minimizing Reaction Time

4. The Four Critical Keys to Conquering Anything

- Assess the situating

- Create a simple plan

- Take action

- Evaluate your progress

Yes, you have to read the book to understand what this all means, The key is that there is a method, it is simple but YOU have to make the effort and do the required work. There are no shortcuts…ever!

Some of the negative reviewers claim that there is nothing new presented in this book. Technically they are probably correct but I would ask them when have they ever really found some new profound concepts that changes anything. There are thousands of self help books to accomplish the same thing just utilizing a different format or structure. This book is simply Mack’s method and it has worked for him. It can work for you as well.

5 Stars A really great book!
There are so many self help Seal team commando books out there to which most are pretty boring same material type of books ” you can do anything blah blah blah ” but this book is different and impressive in so many ways. Firstly, this book is about getting through you day effectivly not building a massive pie in the sky unrealistic business empire none of us will ever do, but just surviving and getting through your day effectivly and in control rather than being controlled. This book for me was what I needed to help me get through the day in the brutal office environment most of us operate in. This book is very handy in how to be effective in day to day activities and actually to think about things rather than just to react, its all about being proactive and on the front foot. I love his quote “I believe there is a solution to every problem” but then he explains his decision making matrix of how to go about solving the problems effectivly and quick. Well done Richard in putting this book together five stars!

4 Stars Great self improvement book
One of the best self improvement books I have read. Mack gives you the tools to help you recognize what really matters to you so you can put more of your resources towards that goal. The only reason I’m giving this book 4 stars, rather than 5, is because this was written when he was trying to get the word out about Bukido - his self defense training. So many of his tools are trademarked and it became annoying reading through so many trademarks. There is also one lengthy chapter where he goes off on a tangent - that seemed like filler to me - and the chapter could have been reduced to 5 pages.

Overall, the tools really do come in handy, and I have already been able to utilize some of them. Certainly worth the read.

3 Stars Good stories….but not very helpful.
This book is easy to follow, and has some great stories from Mack’s experiences; however, it sorely lacks any really motivational or really helpful information. If you want to read all about his SEAL stories then this is the book for you. If you want to overcome fear, gain confidence, discipline and etc….keep looking.

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